The Giant Book of Animal Jokes:
Beastly Humor for Grownups

Created by two world class word players
     who've been playing with words since Pluto was a pup.

Richard Lederer,
a professional word guy, who was elected International Punster of the Year, is a language columnist, broadcaster, speaker, and author of books on words, over 30 of them. (Complete list at

With illustrations by James McLean.

The Giant Book of Animal Jokes: Beastly Humor for Grownups, by Richard Lederer and James Ertner. James Ertner,
a longtime collector of jokes, puns, riddles, and rhymes who took first place at the 25th Annual O. Henry Pun-Off World Championships (see joke 4375), is an MC and roaster and a writer of joke books.

Finalist for the San Diego Book Awards in Humor

The Giant Book offers 4,509 numbered jokes and scores of unnumbered twists and puns — in the introduction, in section intros, in multi-pun jokes such as 2013, 3094, 3693.


You’ll find the kind that made you giggle in grammar school,

the kind that made you hysterical in high school history, lit, and science,

the kind that turns grownups into groan-ups with bar scenes, the battle of the sexes, married life, raising children, politics.

For hex ample:

3403 Why do we call it politics? Because poly means many and ticks means blood-sucking parasites. 4495 A veterinarian who was also a taxidermist put this sign on his office door: Either Way, You Get Your Dog Back.
183 Mother Bear said to Father Bear, "This is positively my last year as den mother." 595 Golf is the game that has turned the cows out of the pasture and let the bull in.
2023 The problem with dark horse candidates is that you can't find out about their track records until you're saddled with them. 3618 Two librarians were talking, and one asked, "Is your husband a bookworm?" "No," replied the other, "just an ordinary one."
An ink blotter is like a lazy baby dog in that a blotter is an ink-lined plane, an inclined plane is a slope up, and a slow pup is a lazy dog. 4362 Knock, knock. Who's there? Owl. Owl who? Owl you know if you don't open the door?
3729 Teacher: "What is dogmatism?" Student: "Puppyism come to its full growth." There's the little bull that wants to stay in the pasture for heifer and heifer.
4080 What do you get when you cross a porcupine with an alarm clock? A stickler for punctuality. 972 Why does the ocean roar? You'd roar, too, if you had crabs on your bottom.

What experts say about The Giant Book of Animal Jokes

"It's Noah meets Noah Webster. Contains every animal joke possum-ble."

MIKE REISS, Emmy Award-winning writer and producer of The Simpsons

It's ". . . a virtual Ark-hive of animal riddles, puns, and jokes. An absolute must reference for humorists, joke-list moderators, and anyone who loves word play."

STAN KEGEL - 2000 "Punster of the Year" and editor of several joke lists including "Groaners," "Puns of the Day," and "Jest For Kids"

"Richard Lederer is the True King of Language Comedy."




It's all for fun. Click below to order The Giant Book of Animal Jokes.